To Date or Not To Date in 2025….
Dating in 2025 feels like navigating a minefield in heels. It’s wondering if that good morning message is sincere, or the start of another disappointment in disguise. For me, getting back out there after divorce hasn’t just been hard, it’s been gut-wrenching. From my experience, whether educated or uneducated, earning six figures or minimum wage, one thing that most of these men had in common was a subtle behavior. A subtle behavior that can often go unnoticed by those who are not familiar with it. But, ladies and gents, I’m here to tell you that this behavior is a major red flag and is known as emotional abuse. If they are already exhibiting this behavior so early in the game, GAME OVER. Walk away. Better yet, RUN!
It had been about a year and a half after my divorce, and I got on a dating app and met a man with whom I had something in common. I was still in grad school, aspiring to become an LPC, and he was an LPC Associate. So I was a bit excited to meet him. We met at a local restaurant, and he immediately started talking about himself and continued throughout the whole date. Once he was done, a server came over and I ordered in English, to which my date asked if I was bilingual. I then told him no, and then he immediately told me that I would never find a job as an LPC because I didn’t speak Spanish. Every time he asked me a question about myself, he used that opportunity to find a way to discredit me.
I had a coworker once belittle me, and when I confronted him about the comment, he told me, “I had to pop your bubble to bring you back down.” This happened right after I graduated with my Master’s degree. I had another man get upset with the words I used when having a conversation with him. His words, “I don’t know anyone who uses those words.” Never in a million years would I think I would be insulted for my vocabulary.
I used to think emotional abuse had to look a certain way: yelling, name-calling, and control. But I’ve come to learn it can wear a much more subtle mask. Sometimes it’s disguised as sarcasm, silence, withholding affection, or gaslighting until you’re the one saying sorry when you’re the one hurting. The damage isn’t always visible, but the scars are real. And now, standing on the other side of that experience, I find myself asking a difficult question:
Do I even want to date again?
Some days, the answer is yes. I still believe in love. I believe in connection. I believe in softness and reciprocity and having someone who meets you in the middle, not just takes up space beside you. But other days, the answer is no because it’s exhausting. I refuse to abandon myself to avoid being alone. Because I know now what emotional safety looks like, and I’m no longer interested in settling for anything less.
If you’re reading this and you’ve ever questioned your worth because of how someone treated you, I want you to know this: you’re not crazy, you’re not too much, and you’re not alone. Emotional abuse thrives in silence, in self-doubt, in the spaces where we second-guess our intuition. So today, I’m sharing something close to my heart: a free tip sheet called Unmasking Emotional Abuse: Recognizing Red Flags in Relationships. It’s a simple, powerful resource I created to help you recognize the warning signs before you find yourself entangled in another emotionally exhausting relationship.
Because the truth is, dating isn’t just about finding the right person. It’s about being the right person for yourself first. Loving yourself enough to walk away at the first red flag is an act of self-love. Knowing your worth so deeply that you don’t have to argue with anyone to see it. Building a life that feels full and rich and whole, even if no one is currently sharing it with you. So, to date or not to date in 2025? The answer will be different for each of us. But what matters most is that we’re dating with clarity. With intention. With healed hearts and wide-open eyes.
And if you’re not ready? That’s okay too. Healing isn’t linear. Protecting your peace is not a weakness; it’s wisdom. Download the free tip sheet here, share it with a friend, and remember: You deserve more than survival. You deserve softness. Safety. And something real.
Love Jacquelyn