Is Peace Boring or Freeing?
First off, what’s peace? Peace is the internal calm that comes when you are no longer at war with yourself, your past, or the expectations of others. It’s not the absence of problems, it’s the presence of clarity, self-trust, and emotional stability amid life’s ups and downs. Peace is a nervous system that no longer lives in survival mode. It’s the quiet confidence that says, “I don’t need to react. I choose how I show up.”
For much of my life, I didn’t know what peace actually felt like. Growing up in a home with a brother who had bipolar disorder but didn’t quite know it yet was chaotic to say the least. Then, becoming a young mother didn’t help my situation. Life got significantly harder. Waiting for the next disappointment, and if you grow up in environments where chaos becomes the norm, peace can feel… well… unsettling. Empty, even. Almost like you’re doing something wrong, so finding peace for me was brand new, and when I say brand new, I mean it. It wasn’t until last year is when I started to experience what it truly feels like, and well…Let me be honest with you, choosing peace has changed my life.
Peace Can Feel Lonely at First
When I began making decisions that prioritized my well-being, cutting ties with people who drained me, saying no without explanation, and honoring my need for quiet, I felt isolated. I felt lonely. I started to long for it, go through withdrawals, so to speak. So I purposely looked for information (gossip) that I knew would create chaos in my life because it felt familiar. Why? Because when you’re used to a life and relationships that are built on turbulence, unpredictability, or emotional dependency, peaceful ones can feel foreign. Like something’s missing. But what’s actually “missing” is the tension you were taught to tolerate. I had to learn that peace isn’t the absence of something; it’s the presence of self-respect, clarity, and alignment.
Peace Heals More Than the Heart
When I started choosing peace, intentionally, daily, I began to notice real changes, not just emotionally, but physically too. My anxiety softened. I slept better (without sleep aids). My body didn’t feel constantly on edge. I wasn’t always in survival mode. My thoughts felt less like a storm and more like a steady stream. Peace isn’t passive. It’s one of the most active, healing choices you can make for your mental and physical health. Once again, it’s a CHOICE. It’s not something your body magically grows accustomed to. It’s a daily choice you have to partake in.
Peace Brings Clarity. Chaos clouds your vision.
When everything feels urgent, dramatic, or emotionally charged, it’s almost impossible to know what you actually want or truly need. Peace clears the fog.
Through peace, I began to:
• Recognize red flags sooner
• Hear my intuition louder
• Make decisions rooted in calm, not fear
• Reconnect with my purpose
I was able to reconnect with myself on a more intimate level. I was able to discover new things about myself that I was never able to see before because of the chaos. And you can too!
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3 Ways to Cultivate Peace in Your Life
1. Protect Your Environment
Audit what’s around you, people, conversations, social media, and even your physical space. Ask yourself, “Does this make me feel safe, centered, and grounded?” If not, it might need to go.
2. Create Gentle Rhythms
Instead of chaotic to-do lists, give yourself a rhythm by creating morning check-ins, evening quiet time, and mid-day movement. Peace thrives in predictability and intention.
3. Release the Need to Be Understood
This one was a hard one for me to be honest. Not everyone will understand your new boundaries or your need for stillness. That’s okay. Peace comes when you stop explaining your healing to people committed to misunderstanding you.
Choosing peace over chaos isn’t a one-time decision; it’s a lifestyle shift. It might cost you some relationships. It might feel lonely at times, but eventually, the loneliness fades. And what’s left is a version of you that’s calm, clear, and finally safe inside yourself.
Love Jacquelyn