Teaching, Counseling…And Barely Holding On
Let’s talk about slowing down and why it felt so hard for me.
During the school year, my life runs on structure and necessity. I’m a teacher by day and a counselor by night. Not only am I responsible for teaching my students, but I am also a safe haven for them during their most challenging times. As soon as they found out what my second career was, they took it upon themselves to ask for help, and I couldn’t say no. Then I hold space for clients to process their deepest pain after school hours. In between that, I’m a single mom, a business owner, a marketer, a homemaker, and a woman trying to keep her life together.
Most days, during the school year, I feel like I’m doing everything all at once. Sometimes when I lay my head on my pillow at night, the noise of the day disappears. Funny thing, though, is that I don’t notice the noise throughout the day when I’m in survival mode. It somehow has become my norm.
But then summer hits.
The structure falls away. The external hustle slows down. And with it… so do I. Total transparency, summertime is the hardest time of year for my mental health. When life slows, my emotions catch up. During the summer, there’s no packed schedule to hide behind. There are fewer distractions and fewer demands. But inside, the grief gets louder. Thoughts of the past start to creep up. I should have been a better mother, a better wife, and a better student. The silence feels less peaceful and more suffocating. The first summer I spent alone after the death of my son and divorce was one of my hardest in my grieving journey. I could describe it as if I were in a large hole in the ground, looking up towards the sky. But every time I looked down to look at the ground and looked back up to the sky, the hole kept getting deeper. I found myself in a constant state of sadness, crying all day. I would find myself losing track of time. Sometimes, when I came back to reality, I noticed that I had already seen three episodes of a show while I was dissociated. A few weeks passed, and it was getting worse. I knew then that I needed to reach out to my support system. Depression comes in many forms, this was how it showed up for me. I am blessed that it has now gotten 90% better for me through the years, and it will for you too. This can be achieved by creating a routine to prioritize your mental health daily.
Your Routine is Your Medicine: Self-Care is a Necessity, Not a Luxury
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is that mental health maintenance is not optional. Whether you’re a teacher like me who has summers off or someone who works year-round, establishing a healthy routine is one of the most powerful ways to protect your peace. This isn’t about being hyper-productive. It’s about being intentional with your time.
A daily mental health routine isn’t just face masks and bubble baths (though those are great too). It’s checking in with yourself. It’s movement. It’s nourishment. It’s processing emotions before they explode. It’s giving your nervous system a predictable rhythm, so it knows it’s safe.
Here are two examples of a 5-hour mental health-focused routine, one for women who are off for the summer, click here, and one for those who work full-time, click here. Use these as a guide, not a rule, or don’t; the option is yours.
Long story short, your mental health deserves structure. Whether it’s a detailed routine or a gentle rhythm, creating a schedule that supports your well-being is an act of hope and healing.
Love Jacquelyn