Not a Goodbye, But a Thank You…

Leaving Flowers at Her Doorstep, Honoring the Past as We Step Into the New

There’s a stirring inside me today, a mixture of excitement and quiet fear. I can feel the winds of change brushing against my skin, nudging me forward into a new chapter of life. But as ready as I am to embrace this next season, I’d be lying if I said it didn’t scare me. Change, even the good kind, asks something big from us. It asks us to loosen our grip, to trust the unknown. And sometimes, it asks us to let go of the version of ourselves that got us through some of the hardest chapters in our lives. For me, that was the hardest part. Letting go of another version of me, who fought so hard to survive the chapter.

The sixteen-year-old version of me who was told she was pregnant and had to live in a world where she was told she was “damaged goods” and she would never amount to anything. The twenty-six-year-old version of me was scared of starting a new career that was foreign to her and male-dominated. The forty-year-old version of me that lost almost everything she loved, the one who held it all together when life was unraveling, who fought for joy even in the darkest moments. The one that helped me crawl out of a dark hole. She deserves more than to be forgotten. She doesn’t deserve shame or silence. She deserves a thank you. So no… I’m not abandoning her. I’m honoring her. I’m leaving flowers at her doorstep, lighting a candle in her name, whispering you were brave, you were strong, and I will never forget you.

This is what growth can look like:

Not erasing the past, but weaving it into the future with tenderness. If you’re finding yourself on the edge of a new beginning, whether it’s healing after loss, starting a new career, or rediscovering yourself after years of survival, here are a few gentle ways to move forward while still honoring the past versions of you:

Ways to Honor Past Versions of You While Moving Forward:

1. Write Her a Letter

Sit down and write a letter to your past self, the version who showed up when you didn’t think you could. Thank her. Forgive her. Tell her what she taught you. Read it aloud. Burn it. Keep it. Frame it. Whatever feels right. Example prompts:

• You protected me when….

• I forgive you for…..

• I admire you because…

2. Create a Ritual

Light a candle every time you feel fear creeping in, as a symbol of how far you’ve come. Say a prayer or affirmation in her honor. Make a playlist of songs that held you together. Rituals ground us and give us space to grieve and celebrate simultaneously.

3. Speak Kindly About Your Past

Be mindful of how you talk about your “old self.” You weren’t weak. You were surviving. You weren’t lost. You were learning. Speak of her with compassion.

4. Carry Something With You

Whether it’s a photo, a bracelet, a quote, or even a journal, keep something close that reminds you of your journey. Let it be your reminder that all the pieces of you matter.

5. Give Her a Name or a Season

Naming that version of you, even metaphorically, helps create a clearer boundary between who you were and who you’re becoming. “She was the warrior in the winter. Now, I am the woman in bloom.”

Healing isn’t a betrayal of who we were. It’s a soft return to who we were always meant to be. Change is good in any form that fosters self-love. Don’t fear it, embrace it. Something that is fear-worthy is staying stagnant. Muttering phrases like “Well, this is who I am, take it or leave it.” No! That is who you choose to be. So today, as I step into something new, I do so with flowers in hand, not just for who I’m becoming, but for every version of me who got me here.

Love Jacquelyn